When was the last time you spent a weekend away with your man? If you are married with kids you know how hard it is to carve out a weekend getaway. I get it. We’ve been there and we are there.
It’s hard to line up overnight babysitting.
It’s hard to find the extra cash to make it possible.
You’re too afraid to leave the little ones, even for a night.
You’ve let the kids merge into center stage in your family and you can’t fathom leaving them.
I know how it is. I’ve used them all.
But I also know the benefits of sneaking away for some time alone as husband and wife.
I also know all those anxieties as a mother about leaving your children overnight aren’t as bad you anticipate them being. The more that you do it the easier it is and everyone survives! You won’t regret it. But you may regret not taking a weekend away with your man.
Attachment parenting is the current flavor of society. That is a mistake, friend. One day your children will grow up and leave the nest. Will you be living with a complete stranger or your best friend? Have you let your children suck all the time, energy and attention? Will your husband feel like the luckiest man alive?
I want to be more head over heels in love in my 50s than I was in my 20s. I want to have an arsenal full of memories of not just family vacation, family game nights but also the date nights, hand holding and weekend getaways taken. That’s not going to happen by itself. It’s not going to happen if we never make time for our marriage. It’s not going to happen with the occasional date night a few times a year. It’s not going to happen when the only time we spend together is family time. That’s not to say that these things aren’t good things, they are. But our marriage needs more.
Satan is looking for strong Christian families to destroy. How is he doing that? One way is through this attachment parenting mentality. When he deceives us mothers into believing that our children come before our husbands. When we want to be best friends with our 4-year-old instead of our spouse.
If you’ve become content to have fewer date nights and more family time, you are sending the wrong message to your children and husband. Your children will be more secure and have a better chance of turning out right for the Lord when they see Mama and Daddy making their marriage a priority, loving on one another in the kitchen, showing affection and flirting when given the chance.
Your children should be so used to date nights that it’s no big deal. But when it comes to a weekend away, that’s a different story. We can make excuse after excuse. I’ve used them all myself. But every time we do take a weekend, our marriage is stronger for it. We create memories that only the two of us share. We laugh, talk uninterrupted, eat a meal without feeling like a waitress. It replenishes not only our love tank but also our servant’s heart when we come home and are pouring back into our children.
A few hours on a date always feels amazing, that is magnified when it’s a weekend away. We are better mothers when we get away with our man. A weekend getaway doesn’t have to be an all-out occasion, it can be a simple hotel stay in the same area where you live. Or it can be a flight away to some amazing destination. Don’t let the cost or place hold you back. Our first getaway was only 40 minutes away from our house. It wasn’t fancy but it was still amazing.
It’s time to stop making all the excuses. It’s time to start planning, saving and making concrete plans to get away with your man! Once a year is completely doable for most couples. I know we all have seasons where it’s impossible. I’ve been there with a new baby or after opening up a new business and the bank account says zero. But after our most recent getaway, to Chicago, I was disappointed at all the past years when we didn’t make a getaway a priority. Even just one night to be kid-free adults, putting our marriage first. Perhaps that would have saved some hard seasons in our marriage if we had made it a priority.
Marriage takes work. We aren’t going to make it to the empty nest season more in love if we aren’t investing in our marriage every year with a weekend getaway.