Do you remember what it’s like to have your first and only child? We all tend to make the same mistake. We are so eager for all of the firsts that we push our little one to learn how to do things much more quickly than we do with our other children. We want them to crawl so we eagerly get on the floor day after day helping them along trying to teach them how it works. We want them to talk so we are drilling new words on a daily basis. We want to start homeschooling so we start preschool at age 3. We are constantly pushing those first borns to do the next thing.
Then we learn our lesson after said child can then climb up onto the desk and launch himself off of it, just barely making it to the couch for a safe landing. Or when he won’t.stop.talking. Then said walker insists that he wants to no longer ride in the stroller because of his new found skill and now you have to walk at a snails pace during your errands because your precious baby can now walk, thanks to yourself.
So baby number two comes along and we no longer push them to learn these new skills at such a quick pace. We usually want them to learn them much more slowly! Right? I know many many moms who say they would love it if baby number 3 or 4 doesn’t walk until they’re passed one because we’ve learned how much more work it is to keep up with them!
We crave the next season in life so badly that we don’t see what’s going on at the moment.
Maybe you’ve said or thought some of these phrases:
I can’t wait till I can date.
We’ll be so happy once we are married.
Real life begins when we start having kids.
Life will be easier when we don’t have any more diapers to change.
Life will be better when they are all sleeping through the night.
Life will be easier when they can be more independent.
Life will be easier when they can help out more around the house.
I will be happy once we buy a house.
I will be happy when we have a bigger house or car.
I miss the baby days, I don’t want big kids!
I hate the baby stage, I just want them to grow up!
We are all guilty of wishing away our current season.
We all want the next stage in life to happen. The next big life change seems far more exciting than how things are going today. Maybe it’s because we are bored. Or seeking happiness from things that won’t ever give us lasting happiness.
Or maybe you’re like me, and clinging as tightly as you can to your current season or the memories of seasons past that you find it hard to see the joy in your current season.
I so desperately want more children, more babies to be exact. I am one of those crazy women who love the newborn and baby stage. I’d be the next Michelle Duggar if my body agreed. But, sadly, my body and my doctor don’t agree. So, God closed that door rather abruptly and much to my dismay. Because I wasn’t ready for that decision, I cling to my children’s babyhood and toddlerhood. I love the little years and the preschool age and all the joy that comes all with them (check out this fun post from Melanie if you have preschoolers! I think we can all relate!). Yet, those days are ending for me. Far too quickly. And so I struggle to see the joy in today’s season as I hold on to what is slipping away.
I don’t think I am alone.
I think many of us moms face this challenge every day. This is why there is the phrase, last baby syndrome. We’ve learned how to slow down and savor that time because we’ve learned how fast it slips away. And we have a hard time letting go.
Whether you are waiting for the next big change in life to happen; if you’re stuck in the mundane of messy houses, sleepless nights and diaper blowouts; or if you struggle to let go, it is time to learn to savor the season you are in.
The next big thing will happen, eventually.
To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: Ecclesiastes 3:1
The house won’t always be a mess and you won’t always be changing diapers. You will sleep again, I promise. It does get easier. Your child will go to the bathroom alone, he will bathe alone and he will not always follow you around the house. You’re sanity will return.
Your kids will grow up. They’ll grow up faster than you’d like. But don’t miss the fun of family bike rides and chapter books by the fire because you long for newborn snuggles again. Don’t spend all your time holding on to the memories and forget to see how much fun it is having big kids who can carry on a logical debate with you.
Savor the season you are in, Mama.
Take it all in and search for the joy that comes with it. Take more time to snuggle, to laugh and to read.
Tomorrow will come and it will bring with it new things to enjoy. Wait for it while you savor today.
Your turn! Do you struggle with savoring your season? Do you wish for bigger and better things? Or do you struggling in letting go of times past? Let’s talk in the comments below!
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