Me time. Most of us mom’s cringe at this phrase at some point in our motherhood. When we first become mothers we couldn’t imagine needing time away from our family. Then you have those who have more “me time” than they do family time. Is it possible to have a balance between the two? Is it possible to make time for yourself without feelings of guilt?
The book The Fringe Hours by Jessica Turner is the book to help you do just that. Alone time, doing things that you are passionate about without feeling guilty.
The book is broken into four parts and she starts out with breaking down those mental blocks that we have created on how me time is a bad thing or can never happen for us. If we don’t take the time to break down those barriers in our minds then we won’t be able to get to a place where we can enjoy taking time for ourselves. When we are constantly feeling guilty about needing time away then we are going to continue to talk ourselves out of it.
I love that she stresses that you need to create that time in your day. If we don’t then the day is going to slip away. Many times, we moms tell ourselves that there is simply not enough time to enjoy a good book, sew or craft with everything else that we have going on in our busy schedule. But we need to first break that habit of thinking. We need to create that time. Whether that means getting up earlier or staying up later to do it.
Jessica walks you through finding that time in your day in the second part of the book.
One creative way that she does this is by teaching you where you can cut hours from other tasks or how you can multitask different things that you are doing in order to get time in doing something you love. For example, thumbing through your favorite magazine while you are blow drying your hair. Double win!
I think we believe that we need to leave the house for hours in order to enjoy doing things for ourselves. And frankly, sometimes we do need that. But sometimes different seasons in life don’t allow for that luxury and we need to get creative. If we aren’t making time for ourselves somehow then we are going to deplete ourselves of any joy that we have serving our families. We have to fill up our soul in our to pour out. I think a lot of times we think that these small pockets of time don’t count as me time. Yet they do and we need to learn to be thankful for them! It’s all about shifting our perspective (which you will also learn to do with this book!)
I loved all of the creative ways Jessica teaches you on how to take advantage of those fringe hours. I think it is the perfect mixture of creativity and inspiration to get you thinking outside the box looking for those pockets of unused time. I think the only thing I would disagree with is multitasking too much when it come to family time. I think when we are doing something with our children or families we should be as present as we can be. Jessica talks about reading or working on something else during her children’s practices or other things like that. I think if we do this too often that we will teach ourselves to check out mentally when our children desperately want our attention. I also don’t have children old enough for practices or baseball/football games yet so I don’t know if my thinking will change once I do.
The Fringe Hours ends on such an inspiring note. I really enjoyed the ending, probably the best! Jessica inspires us women, to live our lives in a community. We weren’t made to walk through life alone. We need friends and ladies in our lives who enjoy the same passions that we do. She shares stories of working on crafts that she loves while being at someone else’s house or them at her’s working together. Enjoy our passion while enjoying our friends can happen and should happen because we were made for community.
Rest, one thing that many of us forget to do while serving our family and others. We are so busy giving our time to others that we neglect taking time to rest and refuel. Without rest, without self-care, without me time we are heading towards burnout and depression. Let’s avoid that!
If you need some help with figuring out how to break down those negative thoughts about me time or need some practical ideas and inspiration on how to make it work for you in your season of life than I definitely recommend grabbing a copy of The Fringe Hours. I’m sure it will be a book that you’ll read a few times! I know I’m ready to give it another read!
Your turn! How do you get over the negative connotation of me time? What are your ways of taking time for yourself? I’d love to hear, let’s chat in the comments below!
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